Finding The One Through Loneliness In Ramadan

Categories: Ramadan

By Monica

Ramadan is a renowned celebratory season, where friends and family gather collectively, special prayers take place, and there’s a real sense of joy, community and unity. However, it can also be a lonesome time for some, particularly those who have newly embraced Islam – where new sisters often lack support or company, feelings of abandonment and alienation can creep in, leaving them alone to deal with the pangs of loneliness.  

This means they can end up losing out on experiencing and reaping the benefits of   connecting deeply with Allah in the most beautiful of months. 

There are ways to tackle this, Insha’Allah.  

  1. Be proactive in seeking out gatherings 

 Allah commands us: 

“and hold firmly to the rope of Allah, and do not become divided.” (3:103) 

Islam is a community-focused faith and is not premised on an individualistic society, because we are better and stronger when we are united. We are all one family, but Shaytaan will try to weaken us and separate us from feeling that we are in actuality part of the ummah 

“…adhere to the Jama’ah, beware of separation, for indeed Ash-Shaitan is with one, and he is further away from two. Whoever wants the best place in Paradise, then let him stick to the Jama’ah.”  

(Jami` at-Tirmidhi 2165) 

Alhamdulillah, mosques provide fantastic services during Ramadan – not just iftars but also beneficial classes and events, some of which are held online too. 

Get involved – visit masjids, and volunteer your help, as a way to be a part of the community. You could also explore social media such as Facebook, to seek out reliable organisers and events which interest you. What’s more, Insha’Allah, by getting involved in gatherings in remembrance of Allah, you will be in the company of angels who descend to witness these blessed gatherings, and it is also a way to protect yourself from the whisperings of the lesser devils and of ruminating on the negative thoughts your doubts and fears may prompt when you’re feeling low. 

This might also bring the added benefits of making new connections and friends, and of cementing the bonds of sisterhood, building a support system, as well as giving you the opportunity to meet like-minded sisters.  

  1. Seeking knowledge  

Sort of tying into what was mentioned in the first point, seeking knowledge is imperative for all of us, whether we are new to Islam or not- there is always something for us to learn, and our self improvement is a lifelong journey.  

Seeking knowledge is also something Allah loves, and what better time than Ramadan to enrich ourselves, as we starve our bodies, to feed our souls. 

The Messenger of Allah (PBUH) said: “Whoever takes a path upon which to obtain knowledge, Allah makes the path to Paradise easy for him.”  

Jami` at-Tirmidhi 2646 

Enlightening ourselves with the life stories of our beloved prophet Muḥammad (PBUH), and all the esteemed messengers too (peace be upon them all), the sahabah/companions of the prophet (PBUH) as well, and of course the great women of Islam inspire us, help us, provide us with resolve and motivation; they are the truest heroes and our role models. Learning about these amazing characters help us to not just feel less lonely but give us solutions to the issues we face ourselves, alhamdulillah.

  1. Learn Who Allah is 

Reflecting on and learning Allah’s Beautiful Names and Attributes is also another thing we can do in Ramadan, and insha’Allah, the rewards for this will be multiplied while we deepen our relationship with our Creator.  

“And (all) the Most Beautiful Names belong to Allah, so call on Him by them”

[al-A‘raaf 7:180].  

Allah’s Messenger (PBUH) said, “Allah has ninety-nine names, i.e. one-hundred minus one, and whoever knows them will go to Paradise.” 

 Sahih al-Bukhari 2736 

An exercise I like to do is to reflect on a name, e.g. Al Nur – ‘the Light’, and then write a few lines about how this is reflected in my life. I find this to be very therapeutic and fulfilling.

Insha’Allah, these activities will increase the love and bond with our beloved Allah, and remind us of our true purpose, helping us deal with the challenges we all inevitably face with fortitude and grit. 

  1. Dua and istighfaar ( seeking Forgiveness)  

Dua ( personal supplication to Allah) is very powerful tool at all times, so imagine its immense power in this incredible month. Whatever you’re feeling, always pray. Pray for Allah’s intervention and know that “miracles” are real because what seems impossible to us is easy for Him.  Allah knows your soul’s whisper, He will always take care of you. Turn your pain into a prayer and see how your burdens are lifted when you place them at His door.  

Seeking Allah’s forgiveness (istighfaar) is also highly encouraged during Ramadan, as at all other times and there are many wonderful benefits (and even miracles!) in us doing so: Relief from affliction, receiving Allah’s grace, attaining Jannah, opening the doors of your provision.. the list goes on, and again, these benefits are amplified in Ramadan. 

  1. See the gift in the challenge 

Allah is ultimately in control, He wants us to do our part and see all our efforts, but He will always do what’s best for us, He is the most Loving, most Kind. 

There are perhaps some instances where Allah sends everyone away, as a gift to us, so we can have that one-to-one connection with Him, and subhan’Allah, this can be a very spiritually therapeutic and fruitful experience. 

What’s more, perhaps one day you may not be able to have this free time, life gets busy, kids, family, work, so think how you can use this time of isolation to be a proof for you on the day of Judgment; think how this is actually an opportunity for something that may not come again, and inshaa Allah this will enable you to embrace and enjoy the time and company with the best of company, the best ally, the best supporter and friend: Allah Subhanahu wa ta’ala. 

Alhamdulillah, once we do this, we can become thankful to Allah when the loneliness turns us away from the world and leads us towards Him, fleeing to Him alone for rescue and reassuring comfort. 

“Unquestionably, by the remembrance of Allah, hearts are assured.” (13:28) 

  1. Know that you can handle it 

Know dear sister, that Allah does not give us more than we can bear, He knows we are strong enough, skilled enough, capable, enough to handle everything He sends our way.  Our tests are there to test our belief, to raise our ranks, to see how much we will keep coming back to Him, and they are a sign of Allah’s love.  

“Do the people think that they will be left to say, “We believe” and they will not be tried?” (29:2) 

And at the same time, He reassures us that we do not have to face these tests alone, rather that He grants us the certainty and comfort we seek: 

“Fear not. Indeed, I am with you both; I hear and I see.” (20:46) 

He guides and strengthens us, keeping us firmly on His path, He grants us ease in our hardships and reassures us that this is the path of His Beloved.  

I ask Allah that He envelopes us, fills any emptiness we feel, as He is the only One capable of doing so. I ask Him to enable us all to make the most of this month, for ease in our fasts, and for strength in our tests, Ameen. Ramadan Kareem, my beloved sisters. 

About the author

Monica is from the West Midlands, and is currently working in higher education. Nature lover, bookworm extraordinaire, and in hot pursuit of the white rabbit!

Many revert women struggle on their own after embracing Islam.

Your contributions keep them supported, and that support keeps them going.

Stay connected

Join our mailing list for tailored updates and receive what matters most to you.

Prefer mobile alerts? Opt for our WhatsApp or Telegram broadcasts for updates on the go.

For more frequent updates, connect with Solace across various social media platforms. You can find us on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter and TikTok.

Subscribe to the mailing list

I want to receive updates about:
* indicates required